Polygamy: The Never Ending Saga (Part 4)

5:55 PM

A few months ago, a few friends of mine were invited to a female only event which discussed the topic of Men & Polygamy. Now when I was told about that, I was seriously pretty happy that at least people are coming out of their shells to talk about an issue that is spreading like wildfire in Oman.  Anyhow, so they attend this symposium and end up hating the fact they joined in. The title would make you perceive something else when in fact the key note speakers were discussing a different topic altogether; how 20 year old ladies seem to target older men for their advantage.

Now I'm sorry to say this, but why do we always (as females) tend to pin point and say that it's the girl's fault, when in fact it's your husbands who are the sole reason you are in such a situation to begin with? Why can't we grow up a bit and accept this fact. It's not like we live in a Western country where a girl can propose. Marriage takes into account families to consent to it, and the man (your husbands) to pay the dowry, so why on Earth is it always the girl's fault?

Did you know that most of them are practically kept in the dark about his other life? Did you know that many don't find out about their spouse's double life until it's too late and are already bound to them by marriage? Did you know that some families demand that a verbal consent comes from the first wife, and the husband ends up getting a family member of his to act as the first wife?

Now how can a symposium urging young ladies who want to get married to back off from marriage for the sake of those who are already married work? Totally absurd and ridiculous if you ask me. If you are bitter then fine but don't spread it to everyone else.

There are so many factors that go into this and blaming the girl doesn't help you or even take away that betrayal or hurt that you feel, not even one bit. It's high-time that we all grow up and use our common sense for once. Be stronger, rather than bitter. Be fierce rather than broken and fragile. Pick up the pieces of your life and move on because a MAN never defines your life, it's all upto you and what you choose for YOURSELF.

Now that I have this all out of my chest, the series of Polygamy: The Never Ending Saga which I started a few posts ago ends here. What's interesting about writing this were the responses and comments I received, which asked why I have my nose in something that is none of my business. Apparently I have no right to write or talk about polygamy whatsoever, since I am not married! 

Have you sat and thought that maybe I come from a family that polygamy is the norm? Have you ever thought that maybe my father is a polygamist? Or that it is an issue that shouldn't be ignored? Why do we have to have everything turn to a negative vibe whenever something sensitive is brought up and talked about? We should all embrace our problems and work on them rather than hiding behind the closet and pretend that everything is alright. 

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  1. Great post, and I've followed the series. And the folks who criticize you, KNOW it makes sense.

    Just saving their @sses for a rainy day I guess, or just that they're in a polygamy relationship themselves.

  2. I totally agree. A BFF, her husband just got married AGAIN without her being ok with it, and she was all mad at the other woman (who was told that the first wife was fine with it), so obviously the other woman cared what my friend thought and was lied to by the men involved in the negotiation. Can't hate on the second wife for something men did to the first.

  3. I really think men are understanding polygamy the wrong way. I've heard of girls getting excuses on being married on like "your dad and my dad married more than 1 why shouldn't i do the same" I felt like shooting myself when I heard that!

    On a side note, I have nominated you for the Sunshine Award on my blog. Check it out x


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